In today’s fast-paced culture everyone is busy and all those distractions can make it difficult to connect with co-workers, clients and even family members. We have all had those conversations where we weren’t really listening to the person speaking or where you got the distinct impression that you were not really being heard.
So, what can you do to become a better listener and cultivate better conversations? One of the suggestions I recently came across regarding “active listening” and building connections is the use of open-ended, emotion-
based questions. For example, when meeting new people, we often ask simple fact-based questions such as “When did you come to work for company X?” However, what if you posed the question “Why did come to work for company X?” The latter question likely leads to much deeper answer than the first and then follow-up with “What do you like most about your current position?” We have numerous opportunities to practice asking deeper questions throughout our day. It’s common to ask our children “How was school today?” which typically
results in a simple answer of “fine” or “good.” However, if the question becomes “What was the best thing about school today?” the standard one-word answer no longer applies and the conversation now has more depth.
Cultivating better conversations isn’t difficult but it does require increased awareness of the questions we ask and practice.
